I had thoughts of feeling like it had been such a long time since I was surrounded by sweet Thai faces and that I may feel like I was starting all over again here. Little did I know that the Lord was going to make it as though I had not missed a wink of it.
Ann, the house mom at Beginnings, greeted us at the airport by saying, "Welcome Home!" That is a bit how I feel being back here. We are staying in the same room at Beginnings, in the same beds, and seeing so many of the same faces we once spent time with every day...this is going to be so hard to leave in a few short days.
For those unaware, we are back here in Bangkok, Thailand to throw 2 Christmas parties for 2 different red light districts. They will be held on the 16th and 17th and will be filled with food, fun, presents, games, and a speaker who will share the Gospel.
Both today and tonight we went and did bar outreach, and I will honestly admit that I was a bit intimidated by the girl that was here this summer. She was brave, she trusted God with her whole heart, and she had a passion to do whatever it took- big or small to see these girls either come to freedom or be closer to it...this was a process to come to, but it happened here this summer. Reading my journal and what my heart poured out was nothing like a distant memory, it was all there with each word I read. However, I was scared to not be able to live up to my first reaction and how the Lord aided in what we came here to do. Yet again, the Lord overcame my silly flesh as He always does, and coming back, the Lord brought me back to where I once was.
As I walked down the streets, the very same paths before, I began to feel overwhelmed by what is going on here. In a sense it all felt like something I had seen before, something I knew all too well to a possible point of detail-by-detail recollection.. like it was just a "part 2," if you will. After this mundane moment of my blast from the past, it hit me even harder than ever what is going on in this city- the lives that some of the most precious people I have ever met have to live out each and every day. My heart is burdened even more than before for this women, this nation, these men, and everyone in the world who is oppressed. This was my prayer to let it be more real to me and feel as He feels, and God answered. This is not flashback...this is reality...this is their day in and day out nightmare... I never knew my burden could get heavier or feel more real than it did when this reality hit me the first time, but it did and it is. Any sweet face means more to me than even before, every smile makes my heart ache to see them walking away and living a life of freedom, every laugh makes me pray harder that we can enjoy true fellowship in being Christ-followers.
I pray that God would use us in ways that we cannot even comprehend. I know that He is faithful and I know that He has something crazy amazing in store for this week and for these women and for these parties we will be holding tomorrow night and the night after.
I pray that they will know us by our love.
I pray that He does more than we could ever think or imagine.
I pray that God becomes their heartbeat and that freedom becomes their song.
Please join me in this battle cry...this truly is the midst of war, but God is good and faithful and true. When all else fades, He remains.
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